Chaos

Confession: Trying to leave our house always end up in chaos. Why is it that no matter how early I start getting everyone ready to go, it always comes down to the last 5 minutes? I have no idea what I'm doing wrong, I've tried it 100 different ways, but it's always a huge ordeal to leave the house.

Truth: The bottom line is, for now, this is my reality - 3 kids under 5 equals chaos when trying to go somewhere, especially in the winter when everyone must have winter coats on. I know that I know that I know, that someday I will actually look back on this and miss it. Children are a blessing from God, every minute of every day. Even when they are screaming so loudly that you think they may have pierced your eardrum. . .

My kids dress themselves

Confession: Sometimes I have no idea if I'm doing this parenting thing right or not. Not enough milk, too much milk, hats and gloves, no hats and gloves, pricey new electronic toys, no electronic toys, organic baby wash, inexpensive baby wash, time-outs, taking away privileges, make them look presentable, let them pick out their own clothes. The list of options goes on and on, it is so exhausting being the mom.

Truth: I know two things, first, I'm trying to follow God's rules for parenting as best as I can, and second, I am sure that I have and will make mistakes. Thanks God He's in control and not me.

Fun-employment

Confession: My husband doesn't have a job, and I'm loving it.

Truth: When the severence runs out, it may be another story.

We're always in a phase

Confession: I'm struggling with the adjustment of having my husband home full time. Yes, on the one hand, I love it and wouldn't trade it for the world. The other hand? I'm just really not used to someone else being in my house that has the authority to make decisions like where and when are we going somewhere, and what in the world is everyone going to eat for lunch.

Truth: Like I said, I wouldn't trade it for the world. When I see the man I love with a four year old girl and two year old boy on his back roaming around the room on his hands and knees playing "horsey", bucking them off to their delighted giggles and squeals, really, what in the world is better than that?

The No-Job Blues

Confession: My husband lost his job last week, and since then I have acted. . . . let's just say, less than Proverbs 31-ish since the dreaded day.

Truth: Driving in the car, listening to a praise song, the God of the universe became so clear to me, yet again. He has given us an amazing gift by having my husband home for now. He had been driving an hour and fifteen minutes one way to work each day. His place of employment was extremely pressured and stressful. My husband was gone from his babies (3 under 5) over 70 hours a week. His health was failing, and he was a very healthy guy. He was offered 6 months severence pay. We thought it was unfortunate that he lost his job right before Christmas. Unfortunate? Absolutely not, what a gift to spend my favorite time of the year with my hubby and father to my beautiful children!

Who am I?

Confession: I can't believe how much of myself I've lost since being a mom. My children brought home questionnaires to fill out from school which I had no problem helping them fill out. . . .favorite color, check, favorite TV show, check, favorite sport, check. Then we got to the question that stumped me. What are your mom's interests and hobbies. Hmmm. . . . . should I put taking care of my kids? Didn't seem like much of an appropriate answer for the question. I ended up writing things like running and scrapbooking, which used to be my interests and hobbies, but lately, not so much. Can you really call it a hobby if you've done it once in the last 6 months?

Truth: I know that I am right where God wants me, and I wouldn't want to be outside of his will for me. I also know that this is a season in life that I dream about escaping, but know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I will dream about going back to for the rest of my life. So who am I? A mom, a wife, and a daughter of the King!

Free from Guilt

Confession: Almost everytime after I've been with friends or family, I end up feeling guilty that I spent so much more time trying to be understood instead of spending time trying to understand.

Truth: I know that my guilt is coming from knowing "When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise." On the other hand, I also know that God did not create me to go around feeling guilty all of the time, the guilt comes from the pride of thinking that I can be a perfect friend and relative. So, I will continue to do my best, and at the end of the day, not feel guilty about the rest!